After reading my colleagues' work and sharing ideas, I realized I could improve my first essay by using good vocabulary and is understandable. I also wi
E.M Forster believes that personal relationships are more
important than patriotism, and I agree.(I thought I could have thought of a better hook) Patriotism is the love for your country while personal relationships are the bond and love you have with people. While patriotism and personal relationships are both good, I personally believe that personal relationships are more important. You cannot have patriotism without personal relationships because how can you love your country if you don't love the people in your country ?
Personal relationships are important because it brings you
closer to people and it makes us feel like we're not alone in this world. Personal relationships creates this unforgettable bond we have for our friends and families that will last a lifetime making us feel happy and loved. Without personal relationships, we would have a world that would look like the purge. People wouldn't have the courage to talk to each other making them shy ( I feel like I could have found a better explanation or vocabulary word for "shy"). Unlike personal relationships, patriotism causes chaos.
Now don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with loving
your country. When you love your country, you give full respect and can proudly say "I'm proud to be an American!" It's just that patriotism can cause friendship or in this case, personal relationships to end. For example, the "All Black Lives Matter" movement and the "All Lives Matter" movement. If my friend supports the "All Black Lives Matter" movement and I support the "All Lives Matter" movement, it creates chaos.(I could've explained this better) We would be fighting on who is right and who is wrong.
Hope you enjoyed reading it!
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